Little Church: Big Worship

Recently, God called me from being a lay-praise and worship assistant at a very lovely suburban church  North of Atlanta to leading worship vocationally smack dab in the heart of Midtown Atlanta.

My church in the burbs is my family.  I love them so much.  They are a fairly large church compared to most churches in America.  Lots of pastors, and assistants, and programs, and funds, and a very talented praise band and worship pastor.

My church in Atlanta is becoming my family.  I love them, too.  They are group of about 14.  They are considered non-existent compared to most churches in America.  They have one pastor who has another full-time job.  They have no assistants, no programs, and their praise band consists of me.

By no means and I trying to draw a picture of my Little Church, as I call it, being somehow superior in its suffering compared to my Church in the Burbs.  Conversely, I am not knocking my Little Church for not having the vibrancy and resources of my Church in the Burbs.

But, God is using my Little Church to completely and utterly break down my concepts of  worship.

Today, as I was completing some menial tasks, I was listening to praise and worship music.  Instead of causing my heart to soar, I grew discouraged.

I was listening to the drums building as the Worship Leader encouraged the congregation into the climactic introduction of the chorus.

We don't have any drums.

The song kept building and building, a lead Female Vocal added depth to the Bridge and the Band added even more layers underneath.  Then suddenly, all the music dropped out except for the synth and the Worship Leader cued the congregation to a more personal and intense singing of the chorus.

I have no harmonies.  I have no layers.  I have only me...an average musician who can barely play an old piano that sounds like an old-timey saloon piano on its best days.   The sustain pedal is about as useful as I am, which makes it sound even more stark and amateur.

Today, listening to well-polished, strategically conceived music overwhelmed me.

I can't do that.  I don't have a dark room with "mood lighting".  I have 14 people.  And they have me who struggles to play and talk at the same time.

And yet...

My Little Church has the Holy Spirit.

Who works through Prayer and the Word of God.

And through our feeble attempts at song.

I have never leaned on the Spirit, Prayer, and the Bible so much as a worship leader in my entire life.

When there is no building drum to give a sub-conscious cue to the congregation that "this is the GOOD part!", I have to depend on the Spirit to move!

When there is no way at ALL that I can play 12 measures of instrumental solo between verses, I've filled that time by reading Scriptures while I chunk out chords with 80% accuracy.

When there is no "mood", no fancy back drops with softly filtered lights reflecting off of them, no dimmed lights, not even power point...do you hear me?  We read our lyrics off of the bulletin!  I was told, once, that such a thing had "no place in Contemporary Worship"...

God smirks at such remarks from what has truly become the Worship Industry.  He is not a Contemporary God.  He is simply God.  And He WILL be worshiped.

His insistence on being glorified is my only hope each week at our Little Church.

Someday my Little Church will be big.  They have the passion and the desire that puts most big churches to shame. Someday, I'll have a band and power point.  But I will be a little sad.  It will be so much more difficult to resist the temptation to manipulate the congregation through sound, sets, lighting, and music.  I fear that I will lose my dependence on my current Worship Fuel of the Holy Spirit, Prayer, and the Word of God.

But, why borrow worry from tomorrow?

Today, God is reminding me that I am blessed to have only Him. 

So, am I a martyr for the cause?  No way.  I'm blessed!  I have a blank slate, a hungry congregation, and a pastor that enthusiastically supports me.  So what if there's 14 of us?  And, so what if there are 1,000 of you!  Every worship leader feels inadequate, stunted creatively, or just overwhelmed at some point.  Whether as a worship leader or a worship-er.  You, too, have the secret weapons, that Worship Fuel that has nothing to do with the skill of your Praise Band.

The Holy Spirit, Prayer, and the Word of God.

Worship resides there...not in a church building.  Big or little.